As we get ready for annual NFL Christmas (April 25-26), it’s time to review NFL Halloween season (Free agency). Many NFL teams are going to find their pillow cases full of King Size Snicker Bars; however, some are also gonna wake up and find their house egged,
a flaming bag of poop, and their lawn covered in toilet paper (I’m talking to you Cleveland). Let’s take a look at some of the most notable transactions this offseason:
T.O. signed by Buffalo – T.O. absolutely destroyed the Philadelphia locker room. However, he wasn’t to fault in Dallas. In the end Jerry Jones gave in to
peer pressure and had to release him. T.O. will be on his best behavior this year in Buffalo and will give the entire AFC East a headache every time they face him. Suddenly, Buffalo’s offense looks very explosive with Lee Evans, Mershawn Lynch, T.O. and 3rd yr QB Trent Edwards. Add in the fact they have a solid O-line, the many explosive TEs in this year’s draft, and Dick Jauron having the hottest seat of any coach in the league, and Buffalo could become very formidable.
Matt Cassel and Mike Vrabel traded to KC for a 2nd Rd pick – Bonny and Clyde, Gary Payton, Ali Baba, Scott Pioli. What do these people all have in common? Apparently, they’re the best thieves of all time as Pioli absolutely stole 2 potential pro bowlers from his former team. Yeah, there have been a lot of rationalizations (the Pats turned a 7th rd pick into a 2nd or the pats didn’t want to pay the money to a first rd pick) but I don’t believe either of those. The Pats added an extra first round pick last year and were willing to pay Shawn Springs nearly $6.5 mil this year (Last year’s 3rd overall pick Matt Ryan only made $3.5 mil last yr in base salary and roster bonus). The
Chefs get a franchise quarterback to build around and a veteran pro bowler that will big leadership AND production. Icing on the cake for Pioli joining that thieves list: Both play arguably the most important position on their side of the ball. How many teams constantly look for either a quarterback and/or a pass rusher??
Patriots attempt to get ‘younger’ by adding everybody over 30 that got cut from other teams (Springs, Taylor, Galloway, Lewis, Baker) – Speaking of the Pats, they made a huge attempt to drink from the fountain of youth, or at least that’s what they said when they got rid of Vrabel, Jabar Gaffney, LaMont Jordan, Rosevelt Colvin, Rodney Harrison, Deltha O’Neal, and Junior Seau. In reality, they replaced most of those players with other old players. Granted, don’t get me wrong, they are a better team. Springs and Galloway still have a lot of ball left in them and Lewis and Baker will fit right into Belichek’s system, but don’t blatantly lie to our faces. Btw, Billy B, if you’re reading, I think you should know
this is not what Ponce de Leon was talking about.
Bears trade two 1st Rd picks, a 3rd Rd pick, and Kyle Orton for Jay Cutler and a 5th Rd pick – I’m going to be in the minority here and call this a great deal for Denver. Denver was in need of a major roster overhaul. Yeah, they came close to going to the playoffs last year, but their defense is atrocious save for a few select players. Four first rounders in the next two years allow them to build that defense to an elite level, while still addressing needs on the offensive side of the ball. Furthermore, they got Kyle Orton who Josh McDaniel is apparently smitten with (I’ve also always been a big fan of Chris Simms and believe he could become a franchise quarterback if given the chance. As soon as he got it going in Tampa, he got hurt and then benched). And if McDaniel, the mastermind behind Tom Brady and Matt Cassel, likes what he saw on film of Orton, then that’s good enough for me. Meanwhile, the Bears are in a win-now mode. Unfortunately, they’re like
Aquaman of the Justice League. Devin Hester is still learning how to become a receiver. Greg Olson doesn’t exactly cause matchup problems. And who on earth is starting at the other receiver?? Earl Bennett?? Finally, that defense is aging and just isn’t the force it use to be. It wouldn’t a problem, except now Chicago has no way to restock itself. They haven’t had a good quality top to bottom draft since 2004 (they’re last late round gem: Roosevelt Colvin, 4th Rd, 1999). Unless they pull out a Super Bowl this year, this trade will set them back a good couple of years.
Detroit sucks again (Trading away Cory Redding and Jon Kitna, Signing Grady Jackson, Phillip Buchanon, Bryant Johnson, Maurice Morris, and other people that suck) – Last year one analyst said that there was only 1 player on the Lions that would start for any other team (Ernie Sims) and only 2 or 3 that would be on any other team (Leigh Bodden, Cory Redding, and possibly Jeff Backus). I’ll add that Kitna would make a great backup QB somewhere. Bodden, Redding, and Kitna are now gone. In return, they got Anthony Henry (Dallas didn’t even want him in their secondary) and Julius Peterson (Hurray??). The people they got to replace those three that left: Phillip Buchanon, Grady Jackson, and resigning Daunte Culpepper. Big name acquisition to supplement those three: Bryant Johnson. Who needs a bail-out more: Ford Motor Company or the Detroit Lions?
Minnesota trades for Sage Rosenfels – Matt Cassel, Jay Cutler, Sage Rosenfels. One of these things are not like the other. (I’ll give you a hint: the first two that got traded are legit). Minnesota has a team ready to make a Super Bowl run except for their quarterback. To rectify the problem, they trade for Sage Rosenfels?? Can I remind that Sage Rosenfels hasn’t been able to beat out Jay Fielder, Brian Griese, Tony Banks, Jeff George, Kent Graham, Kevin Lockett, AJ Feely, and Gus Frerotte in the past.
*Side note: Can this position battle be decided by their names instead of actual talent? Tarvaris vs. Sage. What would be better than this? Our friend L-Griff weighs in on the name battle with this quote (keep in mind that T-Jax did look a little winded during that playoff loss to Philly): “I’d rather have a cool name than asthma”. Enough Said.
Kellen Winslow gets traded to Tampa – The
soulja get out of the seventh layer of Dante’s Inferno and got his wish of a big day. Besides leaving Braylon Edwards alone on the battlefield, this move gives Tampa Bay a legit weapon to pair with the resurgent Antonio Bryant. Tampa’s QB (btw, is that really Luke McCown, there is no other better option? Rodney Peete really refuses to come back? I hear Vinny is still around if nothing else) will finally have a legit red zone option and someone that can cause matchup problems at all levels. If the Ward/Graham running back combo works, the Michael Clayton/Maurice Stovall combo works, and McCown transforms into Sage Rosenfels, then this offense will be able to put up points.
Albert Haynesworth signs with the Redskins – Besides the accusations of tampering, this signing was the best thing the Redskins could have done in free agency. Ever since he got suspended for stomping on Andre Gurode’s face, Haynesworth has been an absolute unstoppable force in the league. In two years since then, he has 14.5 sacks, 3 forced fumbles, and 91 tackles in 27 games. Note: this has all been done facing double teams. The addition of Haynesworth automatically makes the Redskins in the mix and could give them the best defense in the NFC. Other the hand, Tennessee has to hope some of its rotational players step up and that their linebackers can play without the massive beast in the middle.
Most Underrated Acquisitions: o Sean Jones (FS) signing with Philadelphia
This guy is a pure beast o Jason Brown (C) signing with St Louis
They desperately needed O-line help o Igor Olshansky (DE) signing with Dallas
Came cheaper than resigning Chris Canty and will be better o Leigh Bodden (CB) signing with New England
Cheap one year deal for the most talented corner in free agency
What the Hell Were They Thinking Acquisitions (Not Including those mentioned above): o Denver signing J.J. Arrington, Lamont Jordan, and Correll Buckhalter
Josh McDaniels does realize they all play the same position right? o Anything Cleveland did
The biggest name out of 10 free agents they brought in: David Patten
o Bears signing Kevin Shaffer and Orlando Pace
Really? Orlando Pace and last year’s first round pick Chris Williams will start at tackle, making Kevin Shaffer an $8 million backup. For a tackle, Really?
(Editor's Note: True Story.)
